My Life's Scrapbook

Friday, January 15, 2010

Oh my word!

I think in the past month I have gone from 1 to 10 subscribers! This is so amazing and I want to thank each one of you for caring (or just being interested) in what I have to say.

Now, this past week has been what I would like to deem "the fat week". Not that I don't feel like I'm not fat already,but this felt like I was the 163lbs girl with an added 300000 lbs. It seems like no matter how little I ate or how much I worked out, I was getting bigger and bigger. It's a horribly despairing feeling, but I hope that it will wear off. (Oh God I pray I don't stay stuck like this...)

School= same empty void it has always been for me.

Oh. Brain epiphany....
Do all remember like my 2nd most important resolution for 2010. Well I have officially slipped this year now. I purged what I had for dinner cause I just felt like plain shit and I needed to get that food out! However, I will try not to let this fuck up hold me back because I REALLY want to stop bingeing and purging. (just thinking of my next dentist visit (I'm already due :S) freaks me out. What if they look at my teeth and think "What the hell?!? Have you been chewing on battery acid?")

Well, I'll try to update sunday to tell you how much I have lost this week on week 2 of the sparkteens bootcamp.


p.s. I recommend (if under 18) or (over 18) if you need to track calories burned or eaten. It is wonderful.


BlAnCh said...

school blows :( i go back soon
so not looking forward

InvisibleDisorderedOne said...

I'm sorry. I wish you the best!

Anonymous said...

Ughh, fat weeks are horrible. There are times I just stare at myself and wonder how the hell so much fat and hugeness fits into one body. Try to remember that I think you're beautiful... even if you don't.

Sorry about the purging. Seriously, that sucks. But at least you made it from new years to now, right? Yay for progress!

By the way, I really like your new background. It makes me feel happy. Which probably says strange things about me. Oh well!

InvisibleDisorderedOne said...

Thank you so much for the support. *Hugs*

Ang the background... I just felt it was time for a change so why not make it bright green XD